Mom Sauvignon

Scott left Sunday for a business trip and will not be home until Saturday night.  When he is gone our main form of communication is through text.  I was bored the other night and reading through all of our texts over the past few months.  Below is  a transcript of one exchange.  Apparently one that I wasn’t supposed to blog about.  But I am.  Maybe that will teach him to be less Attention Deficit Disorder affected, and to pick up poop next time he comes across it when it is somewhere, ANYWHERE except for in a toilet.

Introduction to the conversation:  I went upstairs to tuck in all of the kiddos.  I pulled back Jack’s curtains to fix his blinds.  I notice cat turds in the window sill.  I go crazy and start screaming and inquiring why there is cat poop in the window. Jack says, “Daddy saw that weeks ago and he just left it there.”.  WHAT????  I give a lecture about how it is everyone’s responsibility to not let there be poop in our house in inappropriate locations and tell Jack that he should have cleaned it up himself or reminded someone.  I cleaned it up.  I screamed some more.  I went downstairs and texted Scott.

Lesley:  Please tell me Jack was lying and you didn’t really see cat shit in his bedroom window weeks ago and just leave it there.

Scott:  It was Friday and I did forget.  Sorry.

Lesley:  I can’t believe I am married to someone who sees cat shit in a window and just walks away.   I am trying to process and figure out how to move past this.

Scott: That isn’t what happened.  I was tucking Jack in. Saw it.  Went downstairs to get something to clean it with.  I must have gotten distracted.  And forgot. Until just now.  And I feel horrible. Don’t facebook this.

Lesley:  No way I am going to Facebook this.  Do you think I want people to know that I have cat shit in my windows?

Scott:  No, but you blog lots of embarrassing things.

Lesley:  Do not.

The yummy dessert our waiter made for us!

My husband is the most wonderful, romantic man in the world and I count myself lucky to have him every single day. Even the days when he is annoying the hell out of me, or I am irrationally being mean to him just because I am a crazy bitch sometimes. And the great thing is that he loves me too, even though I am a crazy bitch! True love conquers all!

October 7th was our 11 year wedding anniversary. Life was crazy and hectic last week (and always), so we didn’t get around to making plans until the last minute. We decided to get a babysitter and go to dinner on Saturday night. I was expecting nothing more than a nice dinner. When we arrived at Dario’s, there was a special table waiting for us in the back with a big bouquet of roses. I thought, “awww, how sweet, he made reservations and got flowers for me.” Then I read the card and looked more closely at the bouquet. And then I started crying in the middle of the restaurant. God, I love him!

The card reads:

Eleven roses red

For eleven years together

A score of baby’s breath

For memories shared and weathered

Three simple roses white

For the lives we have created

One very lucky man

With the girl for whom I’ve waited

I was at Walgreens picking up toilet paper last week.   We are always out of toilet paper.  Even when I stock up at Costco, it still seems to just disappear.   As I was walking to check out, I came across the beginnings of the Halloween display.  I LOVE Halloween so much.   I think it is my favorite holiday.

I found these ginormous 90 inch spiders that I really, really, really wanted.  They were $30 each.  I would need AT LEAST 2 of them and then, of course, a spider web to put them in.  I promised Scott I would stop spending money on crap.  But could these seriously be classified as crap?  180 inches of fake spider goodness is certainly not crap in my book.

Not crap

Scott doesn’t share my obsession with Halloween.  He also doesn’t really like Mexican food.  Thank God he has other redeeming qualities.  He can cook and he smells good.